The expression of self

I have noticed that the most sensitive souls retreat into art to lose themselves, or rather, to express their deepest thoughts. Art can be more eloquent than words and as I grow older, my speech is becoming more tempered as experience teaches me that sometimes there are no words left to say. My paintbrush reveals a different side of me- one that remains private yet to the astute eye, most revealing.

Photo and painting copyright SvD. Oil on canvas.

God spoke to me this morning

A matter has been weighing heavily on my mind for more than a year. This morning as I was walking the hound in the woods I understood straight away that indeed Arnold Harnanan had been coerced into changing his will in 2005. I also understood that the perpetrators were three in number. I cannot explain it any other way except to say that Arnold was speaking to me as I continued walking along. I stopped suddenly to take in the enormity of what I had realised finally. At that precise moment I looked down and there at my feet was a clump of forget-me-nots in full bloom. Arnold had not wanted me to forget him. Ever.

I picked a bunch of the forget-me-nots and continued walking. As I approached my house,  I experienced a vivid jolt in my consciousness. A voice spoke to me: the dead are gone, it is the living that matter.

I walked to my neighbour's house and knocked on the door. I handed the flowers to Pam as she greeted me. "These are for you," I said. Pam took the flowers graciously and thanked me. We chatted for a few moments and then I went home.

As I opened my front door, I smiled. What had happened to Arnold is the most awful experience of my life and I frequently have gone to bed weeping over it. But Arnold is dead. I will always remember him. The living are still part of this life.  I choose to honour God and Arnold in how I live my life from now on. And as Arnold wanted I will never forget.

I will be discussing this saga next on my radio show, Your Happy Memories. The show on Sunday is called  Broken Hearts/Broken Families. Do tune in. Your Happy Memories

The story so far:

Rikki Harnanan lives in Trinidad and was married to local Attorney-at-Law, Gayatri Badri Maharaj. Rikki is currently the partner of Mickela Panday, daughter of the late Basdeo Panday, former Prime Minister of Trinidad and Tobago..

Copyright SvD.

Life is moving very quickly now

Spring is moving fast and sprinting into summer. Already today the common maple shed its flowers and in a few short weeks seed pods will have replaced them. The once sparse woodland is a glorious canvas dappled in bright sunlight and dotted with pale, linden and lime greens. The bottle greens will arrive later in the summer. The so called repulsive toothwort and fresh faced daisies are out in force. Birds are mating and making babies at a frenetic pace; they are ravenous and thirsty. Everywhere there is life in motion- a reminder that one should make the most of the moment as it will soon be gone forever.

Spent maple flowers

Daisies or 'two fried eggs'

Woods today after the rain

Not buttercups but the name?

The 'repulsive' toothwort

Different greens of spring

Photos copyright SvD

Things I saw in the woods today, part 10

The bluebells are just beginning to flower here in the SE of England. They are more than a month late! We normally head down to the woods in April to take in the most beautiful natural phenomenon of a carpet of blue-lilac flowers covering every square inch of the ground. This year the flowers are opening slowly and the full splendour has been delayed.  I always say that nature follows its own tune- the plants know when to emerge from their winter slumber and they are more 'aware' than humans ever will be.

Photo copyright SvD.

Live a full life

I'm a strong believer in challenging myself and trying as many new things as possible. I was lucky to find radio and just dived in basically. I think the abiding belief I have is that I am not afraid to make a fool of myself and to just be me in the process. Now that I've been presenting radio shows I can say that it's true- you can either hear the smile in someone's voice or know they're trying to be something they're not.

That's me in the photo presenting my weekly music show on Ridge Radio.

Warm at last!

It was a long time coming but today we had enough sun to warm our bones- those bones that have been chilled for many long winter months- around 6 to be exact as we had the most awfully drawn out winter. What a feeling! I had bought the Sunday Times yesterday and lay out in the sun reading it for several hours today. I actually fell asleep though luckily wearing a long sleeved t shirt so no chance of sunburn!

Later this afternoon I headed out for the hound's second walk of the day. This photo of the ornamental pink cherry (not native), the lime-green beech leaves and a bit of blue sky, just captures the colours of summer. The hound and I were laying under the trees looking at the sky (I was, the hound was not that interested).

Photo copyright SvD.

Things I saw in the woods today, part 9

Cowslips and wild damson flowers. Damsons (which will be ripe in late September/early October) make a lovely jam but it requires a bit of cunning. Rather than remove the stones from the fruit which could take days and a truckload of patience, savvy cooks boil the fruit whole with sugar. The cooked fruit disintegrates and the stones float to the top of the jam. All that is needed is a steady hand and a spoon to skim the stones. This may sound obvious but it took a chance encounter with a forager one autumn day (as we were scavenging for damsons) to pass on this useful tip.

The cowslips are the yellow flowers by the way! Cowslip are primulas and native to the UK. Garden nurseries import fancy-coloured primulas and charge a fortune for them when the wild variety is abundant at this time of year. Usually found in meadows and very close to woods.

Photos copyright SvD.